Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Holidays done along with assesment

Things have been going pretty good. I met a wonderful woman, Things are going great between us. This I can truly day is the first time I have felt completely in love. Its an odd feeling, don't know if any of you readers ever get or got the feeling that when you met a person it feels like you have known them for years. Well that's exactly how we both feel. Holidays were nice. Spent it at Rainy Lake with my brother where we had spread my dads ashes. Fishing wasn't the best but was still nice and relaxing. Girlfriend and he 2 kids spent the weekend with me there but they had to leave Monday cause she had to work. Then my brothers partner came up Monday with his daughter and stayed till Friday. It didn't rain at all up there. Was a little cool and windy for a few days, but the last couple days it got hot which was great.
Saturday packed up and headed home. I had to quickly unpack and and pack another bag to head to my girlfriends for the weekend and Monday and Tuesday.
We went to her Aunts Birthday party in Burlington where I got to meet alot of her family. I had a great time. We headed back to her place Sunday. Monday we all went down to TGH for my first day of my 1.5 year assessment. It went great and got lots of compliments from my Dr and also the physiotherapist in the treadmill room. I had my 6 min walk test, which I did 695m, I was above average of a perfectly health person non transplant. The predicted distance for a person healthy is 630m! Plus I managed to do it in Flip flops hahahaha.
My clinic was great. Dr said you would never know I was a transplant recipient. And she kidded on why I was even there lol. Tuesday was my bronch. They seen nothing and said it looks perfect in there.

I am still deciding how to unload my house. It is kinda stressing me out lol. Like I figured I will be making my mortgage payment late this month as the money just isn't there :(  So hopefully I come up with a solution.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

What a challenging few weeks

Well these last few weeks have really challenged my mental state. I recently broke up with the girl I was seeing who had moved in. only after 2 months of dating. It was kinda a spare of the moment. She needed to find a place so I had suggest well hey lets try. Well I was horrifically wrong. Things were fine for only a short amount of time before things started falling apart. I have learned that dating and living with someone is 2 totally different things. I broke things off with her but cause she had 2 small children, I told her she could stay in the front from for a month or 2 till she saved for first and last. Well things just got worse from there. I seen no real motivation in finding or saving for that matter and it just lurked me. I talked to a couple of people and got some advice on my situation. I was told to go see the police and talk. Which I did and found she had no right in being there and cause it was my last resort had her removed.
Now only two weeks prior I was kinda seeing a girl that I was getting to know. I thought things were going fine. We were having fun and enjoying each others company. Then I found my so called best friend slept with her. I was crushed and deeply hurt, not cause she did it but cause my so called friend just did it with no thought in outcomes and such. In doing this he hurt a few relationships. I sadly had to let our friendship go.
 With all this that has happened I have decided to just date the odd time but in no way I'm going to be getting into a relationship anytime soon, let alone let someone move in with me. I am just going to try and enjoy my life. Cause life is too short to worry about the people that hurt you. You have to let them go and move forward!
Almost 2 weeks from now me and my brother will be heading up to our usually cottage for a week. I am hoping to just relax, don't worry about a thing and fish like hell!
Although when I do get home I have to seriously figure out how to get rid of my house. Right now I feel trapped and not able to get out. I'm sure in another 1-2 months I will not be able to make my mortgage. I may make it but in exchange not be able to pay any of my bills :( Just that is very stressful. my house does need work but I got no money to get it up to par to get hopefully what I paid for it. Sometimes I think of just walking away but in reality where would I go? I have alot of stuff that I have to take with me.
So ya right now I'm kinda lost in what to do booo :(