Its now almost mid November. The infamous Christmas season is approaching,well if you go into the stores they are telling us its already here. I use to love Christmas and looked forward to it. But now getting older and not having my dad around anymore I just don't seem to get the feel of it. Maybe is all the commercialization they try to push onto us all the buy buy buy. I think the true feeling has been lost.I use to like the family gatherings which are now hard to come by cause everyone is spread apart and have their other sides of the families too. So it is so hard if not impossible to get everyone together.
The last few days I just haven't been feeling myself. Things running thru my mind. Another couple of months it will be my birthday, I will be 35...mid thirties. I did not see myself at the position in my life I am in now. I figured by my mid thirties I would be settled down and have a family started. Be working at a job I love. Instead I'm single on disability hoping all goes well and I will get to return back to work. But that feeling that I have replaced, having to find something new to do does upset me. Its just been a sad week for me, just had to get it off my shoulders.
On a brighter note I did get to have coffee with a beautiful lady that ive been chatting with for the last few weeks. Hopefully get to see where things go and what happens. Guess there is always hope!
*hugs* and *woots!*
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