News you dont like hearing!

Just when I thought life was going pretty good bad news arrives.
Tuesday morning my employer told us cause it was getting slow at work that everyone is getting laid off and will only be called in when and if needed. And then some of us were sent home at lunch that day. So it has now been 2 days I have been home. With everything that has happened to me financially over the last few months, declaring bankruptcy and turning my house back to the bank. This just puts the cherry on the top :(
I have been advised to see what my "employee" rights are. As it is now I will not have any money from EI till poss mid January :( So it make me feel pretty crumby over the coming holiday season. Although if you have read my blogs from day 1 you know I'm not into the whole commercialization they have made Christmas but would still like to get something for the people I love. But I think this Christmas is going to be a write off. All I can hope is the New Year comes a better time and better prosperity.

Been Busy busy busy

Life has been pretty busy the last few weeks. Getting things sorted out with my old place. Work and such. Last weekend we decorated my truck up for the Stayner santa clause parade. It was a pretty fast parade only lasting 30 mins.
We had snow but the last couple days has been warm and just about all the snow has melted. Although some of the ski resorts around me have opened already. Next weekend were venturing out to cut down a Christmas tree. It will be the first time for me. My family use to just cut the pre cut ones. So this should be an adventure.
Life in Stayner is pretty good. I have met a few people and am enjoying myself. It was time to get outta Penetang. Was getting tired of all the soap opera drama.
Personally Im the happiest I have been for a long time..

RIP Dear Amber

My dear cf and transplant friend passed away early this morning. She was the most courageous fighter I have ever met. She over came every obstacle. Before transplant  she beat the odds after the doctors had told her that she was removed from the transplant list. Then got so sick that she was at the lowest lung function and was told there was nothing that they could do for her and that they would just keep her comfortable and to expect the worse. She fought with everything she had and with the support of her family and our wonderful CF friends she overcame and was re listed. I so happy the day I heard she had gotten her call and had a chance and a new life. She had a very hard recovery. She never did fully recover as cause of the high dose of meds made her kidneys fail so she was on dialysis. Even after that she kept in good spirit and got to spend time with her family and loved ones.
She started to decline again and repeated lung infections. She was admitted to TGH a couple times but this last time she wouldn't make it. She got the terrible news the other day that she was indeed going thru chronic rejection. Today I heard the terrible news that she lost her fight for her life. Its so sad seeing as I just talked to her last night. We had lots of wonderful chats and looked out for each other. Me and my brother did get to visit with her last Tuesday. I am so thankful I got to see her. We had made plans all summer long to get together for a bbq but both our schedules were conflicted.
Sadly this is the second close cf/transplant friend I have lost this year. I have others that are now listed for their second transplant. I wish I could pass on some of my good health to my other transplant friends.
I will miss you tons, you can now breath easy and hang out with all our other cf friends.

Update on my house

So I went to the bank at the starting of last week to see what my options are. Basically I got none. They said they can try and refinance for a lower rate but cant do that till I get up to date on my payments :( They asked why I was having a hard time and I explained I have had a hard time catching up since I was off work for so long because of transplant and such. The lady I was talking to was very compassionate and was asking me about my transplant as her friend "jamie" that lives in T.O had a dbl lung transplant due to CF. What a small world. I inquired on his last name but seeing as he was a friend of a friend she couldn't remember the last name. So I have weighed the options as I cant even sell. And I don't think there is an option of just signing it over to someone without lots of legal fees which I do not have the money for that. So as it is i am just staying for a couple months without making payments to save for first and last and find a place all inclusive to rent. I have been looking around Barrie and area as Midland/Penetang has nothing really keeping me here anymore. Barrie is close enough to commute to work every day and I will be able to hang out with my brother more. I am not too sure on how foreclosure works but I guess I will find out. And lets face it you cant get blood from a rock. This whole situation has been playing heavily on my mind the last couple of days and results have been getting headaches so bad I haven't been able to go to work, which in the end doesn't help the financial situation. I feel I really have no one to turn to to help but really its something I have to do for myself.
So any of you that read this know of a place coming available in the Barrie area let me know, I'm ideally looking for a house with at least 2 bedrooms and hopefully at least a single car garage.

Holidays done along with assesment

Things have been going pretty good. I met a wonderful woman, Things are going great between us. This I can truly day is the first time I have felt completely in love. Its an odd feeling, don't know if any of you readers ever get or got the feeling that when you met a person it feels like you have known them for years. Well that's exactly how we both feel. Holidays were nice. Spent it at Rainy Lake with my brother where we had spread my dads ashes. Fishing wasn't the best but was still nice and relaxing. Girlfriend and he 2 kids spent the weekend with me there but they had to leave Monday cause she had to work. Then my brothers partner came up Monday with his daughter and stayed till Friday. It didn't rain at all up there. Was a little cool and windy for a few days, but the last couple days it got hot which was great.
Saturday packed up and headed home. I had to quickly unpack and and pack another bag to head to my girlfriends for the weekend and Monday and Tuesday.
We went to her Aunts Birthday party in Burlington where I got to meet alot of her family. I had a great time. We headed back to her place Sunday. Monday we all went down to TGH for my first day of my 1.5 year assessment. It went great and got lots of compliments from my Dr and also the physiotherapist in the treadmill room. I had my 6 min walk test, which I did 695m, I was above average of a perfectly health person non transplant. The predicted distance for a person healthy is 630m! Plus I managed to do it in Flip flops hahahaha.
My clinic was great. Dr said you would never know I was a transplant recipient. And she kidded on why I was even there lol. Tuesday was my bronch. They seen nothing and said it looks perfect in there.

I am still deciding how to unload my house. It is kinda stressing me out lol. Like I figured I will be making my mortgage payment late this month as the money just isn't there :(  So hopefully I come up with a solution.

What a challenging few weeks

Well these last few weeks have really challenged my mental state. I recently broke up with the girl I was seeing who had moved in. only after 2 months of dating. It was kinda a spare of the moment. She needed to find a place so I had suggest well hey lets try. Well I was horrifically wrong. Things were fine for only a short amount of time before things started falling apart. I have learned that dating and living with someone is 2 totally different things. I broke things off with her but cause she had 2 small children, I told her she could stay in the front from for a month or 2 till she saved for first and last. Well things just got worse from there. I seen no real motivation in finding or saving for that matter and it just lurked me. I talked to a couple of people and got some advice on my situation. I was told to go see the police and talk. Which I did and found she had no right in being there and cause it was my last resort had her removed.
Now only two weeks prior I was kinda seeing a girl that I was getting to know. I thought things were going fine. We were having fun and enjoying each others company. Then I found my so called best friend slept with her. I was crushed and deeply hurt, not cause she did it but cause my so called friend just did it with no thought in outcomes and such. In doing this he hurt a few relationships. I sadly had to let our friendship go.
 With all this that has happened I have decided to just date the odd time but in no way I'm going to be getting into a relationship anytime soon, let alone let someone move in with me. I am just going to try and enjoy my life. Cause life is too short to worry about the people that hurt you. You have to let them go and move forward!
Almost 2 weeks from now me and my brother will be heading up to our usually cottage for a week. I am hoping to just relax, don't worry about a thing and fish like hell!
Although when I do get home I have to seriously figure out how to get rid of my house. Right now I feel trapped and not able to get out. I'm sure in another 1-2 months I will not be able to make my mortgage. I may make it but in exchange not be able to pay any of my bills :( Just that is very stressful. my house does need work but I got no money to get it up to par to get hopefully what I paid for it. Sometimes I think of just walking away but in reality where would I go? I have alot of stuff that I have to take with me.
So ya right now I'm kinda lost in what to do booo :(

Just an update

Well hello everyone,
I cant believe come July 25th I will be 1.5 years post transplant! Where does the time go? I feel its going by way too fast. I have been very lucky and have not had any complications or illness. I have had a couple colds and a nasty ear infection. But other then that no iv's or hospitalization. I still think about my dear friend that lost her battle this month. It really puts things into perspective on how valuable life is. They have booked my assessment for Aug 27-28th Its the Monday and Tuesday after I get back from holidays. Thank god I no longer have to do the Gastric Emptying test anymore! Its just my regular day Monday (blood work,pft's. chest x ray and cat scan,6 min walk test and then clinic) They have booked my bronchoscopy for Tuesday. A couple of my other transplant friends also have their assessments too so will be nice to see them and catch up :)
Its less then one month till I head to the cottage for a week of fishing and enjoying the peace and quiet of the north. I am so looking forward to it!
This coming long weekend im gonna go up to my sister and brother in-laws trailer for a visit. They have it on the Magnetawan river which is just north of Point au barel. Havent decided if im going just for the day or a couple, we will see.
This Saturday the 28th with sadly be the 12 year anniversary of the passing of my dad. I father and a best friend to me. Like I said earlier time goes by way too fast! Me and my brother are planning on driving up and just sitting on the shore and have a visit. We are hoping some friends are at the cottage and we can say hello. We haven't been able to our cottage the same time as them anymore.
Life for me has been going. I have been sorting things out and finding out what I really want. To enjoy my self and experience life. I had to let a best friend go this past week due to certain circumstances. It was sad. We did alot together and had some fun together but when a person crosses a line and breaks trust its hard to ever trust or forget about what happened, I no longer want negativity and doubtfulness in my life. Life is too shorty to have to deal with that!

I will try and update in a few weeks.

Its time for a change

Have going thru a life saving procedure and having no idea how long it will extend my life, makes me think of certain things. After loosing a close transplant friend and seeing how fast things can go down hill and hearing news of others that are having several problems and possibly facing a second transplant is one thing that is always in the back of my mind. Its hard not to think about it having gone thru it. I always longed for a relationship and such, but now I just wanna go out and enjoy my life, simplify my life, have nothing tieing me down and do my own thing. Although I will/did hurt feelings along the way I have concluded I have to just worry about me. Its my life and the only life I will have. Who knows what will happen next year or on. I too have loved and gotten my heart broken, but I pick up the pieces and move on. I believe everything happens in this world for a reason.

Long Time No Update

Well well, things have been going great at this end.  No complications or anything...knock on wood. I'm enjoying the beautiful summer weather, that is when I'm not working lol. In the next couple of weeks I will be challenging myself along with these new wonderful pink lungs, where I will be participating in the Warrior Dash at Horseshoe Resort. It should be fun and certainly an experience. Also end of August me and my brother will be heading up to the cottage we rent every year. Looking forward to floating around in the boat and doing some fishing. Haven't gotten out much for fishing. Weekends are always so busy. I have already been to Canada's Wonderland twice this summer and it was a blast and planning on heading a few more times before the end of the season. Gotta love season passes :)
Here is a video taken by a participant in last years Warrior Dash. So you get an idea what I'm in for hahaha.http://youtu.be/O4kz6poULio

I am also booked for my 18 month Post Tx assesment the monday I get back from holidays on the 27th. I still cant believe its already been a year and a half. Time is just going by way too fast. Sometimes I wish I didnt have to work so I could enjoy it a little bit more.

Great Strides May 27th

Hello folks,

Ive been pretty busy with life. Nothing really in particular just work and stuff around the house, getting my car on the road.
I have been seeing a wonderful women for the last month and things seem to be going great!
Last week I did my first public speech on CF and Transplant. I was a little nervous at first but got thru it. I seen a few tears shed so I'm hoping the message got out there that there has to be a cure found. I have been helping out with organizing the second annual Barrie Great Strides Walk for CF on May 27th. We are dedicating the walk to my dear transplant and cf friend who lost her battle this march.
Last year my teams goal was $1000 and we raised over $2000, so this year I set our goal to $3000 so hopefully we can make that and surpass it!
If you would like to make a donation, any little bit makes a difference just click on the link below.https://secure.e2rm.com/registrant/welcome.aspx?EventID=85905&LangPref=en-CA&RegistrationID=1352464&Referrer=direct%2fnone



This is a news clip from last years Walk. Allison and I were both interviewd.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=flOatfAKBsA&list=FLsUvh30HdeNbLauTF8xECzg&index=3&feature=plpp_video

Reflecting on the past week.

This last week has been very tough for me and can only imagine what the family is going thru. Thursday night was the visitation of a friend, cfer and transplantie. It was a very emotional night for all. Allison was truly loved and had lots of friends and family.
Friday afternoon was the final goodbye for Allison and to let her go to a better place where she can now breath easy. The church was filled with no seating left. The service was very beautiful. So now the healing process starts.
Like I was telling my brother today. Some people think yes I just lost another cf friend. But She was more of just another cf friend. She was a true friend! And cause of that this has really hit me hard.
Its so hard to think she is gone. But like her family told me to not take life for granted. Cause you never know when you might not be here. Like Allison's boyfriend said she did more in 1 year as a couple that many people do in 2 years. She was a true inspiration and will live each day to the fullest just for her!
Another thing my brother said when I told him I was glad that I didn't go to Florida this past week cause I would not have gotten the chance to say a final goodbye to a wonderful person, He said "everything happens for a reason" meaning there was a reason I wasn't meant to go to Florida.
So hope we can all heal our hearts and souls and think that Allison is looking down on us. I am not a religious person but am beginning to think there has to be something up there to look forward to.
You are greatly missed by all Allison Reid, You were a true friend,Daughter,Sister and Girlfriend! Breath Easy beautiful angel.

Today we say good bye to a good friend

Today has to be about the worst day I have had in a long time. I woke up really late for work and had to rush out the door with no breakfast. Later on in the morning I learned that a good Cysta had lost her battle with an infection she had been fighting over a month with. She recieved her double lung transplant a week before me. We had met off a cf website previous and attended the same cf clinic. We also lived up north of the city in the same area. We created a bond and helped out each other thru things. I was her support through her waiting for her call as she was for me. I was so happy to hear that she had gotten her call and a chance at a new life. She was yound and deserved it! Then I week later I got my call, how amazing! We both recovered together on the transplant ward and did your physio rehab.
That may we both did the Great Strides walk in Barrie and were asked to be the ribbon cutters for the start of the first annual walk for cf.
She met a great man and fell in love. I was so happy for her. She got to go back to college and get backing into her nurse schooling. She did get to experience alot of things she didnt get to before transplant in such a short time, but indeed it was a short time and deserved longer on the earth. She had and was a true fighter and never gave up even at the end. Although I dont know the final details of what happened and am gonna leave it at that, her family has enough to deal with at the moment of loosing their twin daughter/sister. She is now up looking down on all us sending us her strength she showed and breathing easy.

With all this happening, it shows how short life can be sometimes. I am just in awe and has really scared me. What to say this could happen to me today,next week or months from now. It can happen so fast. I know know why when im meeting someone to date and I mention I have CF they just turn and run. There is not enough strong women out there, what ever happened to love triumphs all?
I wish I didnt have to work and be able to just go out and enjoy life and explore new things and new adventures instead of wasting my time working 5 days a week.
I just dont know anymore, feel like life is passing me by and that anyday I could not be here or get so sick that I cant do anything and wish I could of.


RIP Allison I will always remember the times and talks we have had, you can now breath easy beautiful women.

Time to celebrate

It is now officially one year since I got that call on a February night. I got the results back from my bronchocopy and it show no rejection at all. So they lowered my prednisone again to 7.5mg. All my other tests I imagine were fine as they would of contacted me if anything wasn't good....well at least I hope they would hahaha. That's about all on the transplant side. Life has been going pretty healthy with no complications.
In other news, I held a huge party on the 25th to celebrate my 1 year mark, my 36th birthday and my brothers 33rd birthday. There were tons of people here and was a wicked night! i am so lucky to have such wonderful friends!

As I mentioned in the blog previous that I had to bow out of the trip to Florida. But I did get to box the cottage at Rainy Lake for the second last week of August. I have to at least get away somewhere this year lol.

Such a stress filled day!

Today was my last test for my 1 year assessment. Wow 1 year where does the time go? I had the solid gastoric emptying test today. Its kinda nasty test. They give you a microwaved egg white which they inject radiation into. They then take an image at the 1 hour and 2 hour mark then the last one at 2 1/2 hours after the 2 hour mark. So it was a long boring morning. You cant eat or drink anything till the test is over. Tuesday I had my bronchoscopy which my favorite dr did. That went fine, was awake for the whole thing which I like alot better. Monday was all the small tests such as blood work (after they got my paper work) Pulmonary function test which was an amazing 96%, chest ct scan, 6 min walk test which I also did amazing with too. Then clinic. It was truly a long day didn't get out of TGH till almost 5pm.





Today I got the dreaded awful news that my good transplant friend Allison who's blog can be found here : http://allisonswaitinggame.blogspot.com/ She was transferred to Toronto from up here cause of fevers, today I heard she is now fighting for her life on life support. It is so unreal. We were both recovering in hospital after transplant as she got hers a week before me. I am truly praying she pulls through. I am so not ready to say good bye to another transplant friend. The world can be so mean sometimes. I remember her excitement that she was able to return back to school for nursing and she met the man of her dreams. She was living life to the fullest. Its just so unfair!!!
On another note I was suppose to be going to Florida with my brother, his partner and family. But after lots of thought I had to pull out due to financial reasons. I'm pretty upset cause I was looking forward to it so much but such is life.

All I got to say is tomorrow better be a better day, sure hope I hear some positive news about Allison. It is really gonna be tough to sleep tonight!

Wow 1 Year Mark Coming Up!

It crazy that come the 25th of this month will be a year that I received the gift of life. It has truly been a blessing and and so happy that I have almost beaten the first odd. I hope there is many many more years ahead! I am at Toronto General 3 days next week for my assessment. Its gonna be a very long day Monday and then Tuesday and Wednesday are just half days. I am planning a huge party on the 25th to celebrate my 1 year mark my 36th birthday which is the 27th and my brothers birthday which was the 4th. It should be a great time and cant wait for it!

On other news, im still working my ass off. I have signed up for the warrior dash in July and in a few weeks will be heading to Orlando.
I have been deciding on what I'm gonna be doing. As I can not really afford to stay where I am. and then on the other hand cant afford to sell. Seems to be a vicious circle. What I truly need is a nice lottery win, although you have to have money to buy the ticket hahaha.
In actual reality I shouldn't really be going off to Florida, even though I have put some money away for it I don't wanna leave myself short later, but on the other hand I doubt I will ever get the chance to go ever again.

Well I will update after all my tests next week and let you all know how I made out.

2011 has come to an end!

This should of been the last blog of 2011 but its a day late so I guess we will call it the first blog of 2012.

This year has been an extreme roller coaster. The first month and a bit I was still living on 02 and had a pager by my side waiting for my call. I got my first one on Feb 2nd, 2 days before my brothers birthday which turned out to be what they call a dry run. My second call came at 9:30pm feb 24 which was a go and I received the gift of life Feb. 25th, 2 days before my 35th birthday. Things went pretty smoothly with only a couple bumps in the road. Was out of the hospital in a month due to sternum issues and it not wanting to stay clamped together. I returned back to my full time job 2nd week of June only 2 weeks after my 3 month assessment. Things have been good so far. Had a great summer, got my jeep all back together and back on the road. Got a few long awaited things done around the house and yard that I couldn't do while having next to no lung function and on o2. Got back up to the cottage this Summer and also ventured out by Parham to my older brothers cottage for a weekend of fishing. All in all was a pretty wicked summer with friends and family. Had many bonfires too the summer which was nice as I missed that for the past year. Then ending of this year brought some terrible news for my niece and her family and that her little girl would need a liver transplant, same as her older son needed 2 years ago. I have tried to give as much support as I can as I have been down the transplant walk too. And have tried to make it down to Hospital for Sick Kids in Toronto when ever I can. She did receive the gift of life from her father and took place just this past week. She is doing well but still has a couple more surgeries to go thru. I came down with my first illness since transplant. And like I blogged about it earlier it is weird and a little scary. It left me with a ear infection which is not nice and is the first one I have ever had. I had to go to the Hospital here in town and get a script for some antibiotics. I then had to call my transplant coordinator to inform her of what was going on. She said that I may require a longer dose then 7 days cause of my compromised immune system. Well after the 6th day it was wasn't any better so I called this Friday to inform her and see if they could write me a refill as my family dr was on holidays and I didn't wanna go back to the ER. So she did some research and asked me a few questions. She called me back after lunch to inform me that they were gonna change my antibiotics to good ol Cipro. Her reason was cause they found some pseudomonis in my lungs at my 9 months assessment when the did my bronch. What the hell???? I thought they would of been on top of that and got me on something as soon as they found it. I did have some at my 3 month mark which they figure was from my sinuses and they had a picc line put in and had to do 2 weeks of home ivs to clear it up. So I am keeping my fingers crossed that the cipro looks after it. I know before transplant with my old cf lungs and lung infections that the cipro started not doing the trick so not sure if its the same with new pink lungs.

To end the year I held a New Years bash at my house. I was a pretty awesome party and lots of friends came, im guessing there was about 15 drunk people here. Had the coffee table pushed aside and had dancing going on and of course the infamous gathering of drinkers in the dinky kitchen,whats up with that. This year we decided to get dressed up in out best cloths and we all weren't looking too shabby! So now its the starting of 2012, I sure hope is a great year with many great adventures and new experiences, and that its all good health for me, my family and friends. My first adventure for 2012 is a trip to Orlando Florida in March with my brother, cant wait for that :)